How to Be a Better Husband (15 Ways and Tips to Help)

This article reveals a lot of powerful tips to help you become a better husband.

Yes, the tips in this article can work for just about anyone, if properly implemented.

 

Importance of Trying to Be a Better Husband

There are many roles in the life of the family unit that each of us is called upon to fulfill.

There are the roles of being a son or daughter, a father or mother, a brother or sister, etc.

Two other critical roles within the family unit structure are the roles of a wife and husband.

The importance of building on a solid foundation is critical as it pertains to just about everything in our lives.

This can be seen in the building of a strong and firm foundation when building a home or business structure.

This is also true as it relates to learning a language and building on the essential foundation of learning one’s ABCs.

Another important structure in the lives of individuals is the importance of family.

The foundational basis of a family unit begins with a wife and a husband.

Therefore, these two roles and their response, independent and dependent interactions, are critical to the building of a strong family unit.

 

Personal Story

Perhaps, your observations of your father as a husband were that you did not doubt that he loved his wife, your mother, but often demonstrated that love in practical ways.

The generation that my father was part of were never ones for public displays of affection nor was there any sharing of household duties.

Maybe because my mother never worked outside of the home until the later stages of my teenage years.

Specifically, I can never recall my father doing the dishes, doing the laundry, or using a vacuum, etc.

Not to make excuses for him but it just didn’t seem to be part of his generational thinking.

However, having said all that, I do not doubt for one moment that my father was not a good husband and did indeed love his wife.

It may be possible that being a good husband is not about doing necessarily but about being.

 

15 Best Ways and Tips to Help You Be a Better Husband

 

1. Be Attentive 

Each of us needs to be valued.

That value begins inwardly and that probably is the greatest valuation that anyone can have about themselves.

However, it is important that other people as well validate us as individuals.

Consequently, to be a better husband means to be a man who is attentive to their wife.

This means to value her as an individual, her experience, opinions, etc. that she brings to the relationship.

Additionally, everyone has needs.

Therefore, a good husband will endeavor to be in tune with his wife’s needs.

Some of those needs may include time being alone, the need to be loved, the need to be appreciated, etc.

 

2. Have Date Nights 

So often, a marriage begins to lose its excitement and individuals fail to work at the relationship.

A good husband, just as when he was courting his wife, must endeavor to provide that same focus, attention, and appreciation for his wife as when he began dating her.

The marital vows are not an end to a relationship.

The I do’s are not I’m done.

Marriage is just the beginning of an adventure of becoming one and it needs to be continually cultivated.

Therefore, to recapture or keep the relationship alive and vibrant, it is important to return to the days when dating was something that was looked forward to and relished.

 

3. Compliment Publicly 

Both men and women want to feel that they are attractive and alluring.

Therefore, it is important for a man and husband to continue to keep and keep lifting his wife upon that pedestal when they are socializing with other individuals.

This authentic appreciation of one’s wife will go a long way in keeping the relationship real and vibrant and will signal to others that the relationship is on solid ground.

Quite frankly, your wife will be the envy of others.

 

4. Compliment Privately 

Of course, just as the husband compliments his wife publicly, it also must be done in the privacy of their own home.

Suffice it to say that real compliments about a woman’s beauty, both internally and externally, will go a long way to fan the fires of passion and will keep the embers of the romance constantly stirred.

 

5. Be a Team 

When a couple marries, they become husband and wife.

In essence, they become a team.

Just as teams or teamwork is critical in the workplace, how much more critical is it in the family unit’s home.

A good husband will involve his wife in the decision-making process, the rearing of the children, vocational plans, etc.

As most marital vows state, the two shall be joined as one.

As one they become inseparable. They become a team.

Also See: Best Tips to Help You Become a Better Man.

 

6. In-Laws 

Being a better husband also includes respecting and honoring the in-laws.

This specifically pertains to mothers-in-law.

As one can imagine, the thinking of some parents is that no marital partner will ever be good enough for their little boy or their little girl.

Consequently, there may be a bit of disapproval or there may be friction as to differences of opinion on how things should go, etc.

However, the fact that the in-laws are the parents of your wife gives requires that the husband give them their due respect.

This doesn’t mean that they rule or be allowed to create dissension in the home.

People can be respected even when boundaries are imposed.

If one respects the wife, they should respect the in-laws.

 

7. Don’t Go To Bed Angry 

An excellent rule of thumb on being a better husband or continuing to be a good husband is to never go to bed angry.

This simply means that any conflicts, and there will be conflicts, should be resolved before sleep is given into.

If the argument or difference of opinion is not resolved right away, it will continue to fester and like a splinter in a finger or thumb, the festering will continue and continue to cause great pain and sensitivity.

It is always best to resolve one’s anger with each other before going to sleep.

 

8. Start With a Kiss 

Another important activity that demonstrates the desire of a husband wanting to be better in his role is to be affectionate with his wife.

Consequently, it is best to seal the end of the day with one’s wife with a loving kiss and began the dawn of each new day with that same commitment.

Therefore, a kiss should be part of the ongoing commitment to each other as they start a new day together and declaring their love through this physical action.

 

 

9. Support Her Dreams 

As a human being, it is important to reiterate to the husband that his wife is an individual in her own right.

By this, it is meant that she has her own uniqueness, personality, goals, and dreams that she wishes for herself.

Therefore, it is important for a husband to have discussions with his wife and listen attentively to what she is sharing.

In addition, to listening to her regarding her dreams, it is important to support those dreams not only emotionally but physically as well.

Everything within the family’s power should be exerted to help her achieve those dreams.

A good husband helps to fulfill the dreams of his wife

 

10. Chores

As I stated previously, I cannot recall my father doing any chores around the household.

However, today is different and women and men should have equal roles and responsibilities within the home.

Therefore, being a good husband is a man who is not averse to plugging in and moving the vacuum cleaner, changing a diaper, immersing his hands in dishwater, throwing some laundry into the washer, and occasionally picking up an iron to press out the wrinkles.

 

11. Pamper

No, we’re not talking about changing the diapers, although that is alright.

By pampering her it means to spoil her.

Examples of this type of behavior include a spa day, letting her sleep in while you attend to the children, an occasional breakfast in bed, time for her to have a luxurious bath, or having her nails done.

You get the picture.

Pampering one’s wife is practically showing the husband’s love and the cherishing of his wife.

 

12. Communication 

While attending a marriage enrichment seminar, it was shared with us by the facilitator that the two most common areas of conflict within a marital relationship and which may lead to separation or divorce are money and communication.

Some men are not good communicators and keep their feelings to themselves.

However, this is not about expressing one’s feelings, but it is about a commitment to communicate with one’s wife.

This means that the husband is willing to not only share with his wife about what is happening in his life but also to listen to what is happening in her life.

Communication is a two-way street.

Therefore, a good husband will be a good communicator.

He will both express himself as well as listen to the expressions of his wife.

 

13. Decisions 

The old-time thinking for a husband was that he wore the pants in the family and therefore he was the decision-maker.

Like the Oldsmobile commercial that said, “it’s not your father’s Oldsmobile anymore”, so it is with marriage.

The husband may still wear the pants in the family, but a good husband will only see that as the actual physical reality in wearing those trousers.

Therefore, decisions should be a joint process that involves both the husband and the wife.

To be a good husband means to value the input of his wife towards the decision needing to be made.

It means honoring her experience and perspective on what course of action may need to be taken.

 

14. Listening 

As indicated previously about communication, a special emphasis on being a good husband is placed on listening.

So often, men activate their non-listening gene when the wife is talking.

So often, all individuals will say one thing but are really meaning another.

Therefore, it is up to a good husband to sort through the mixed signals and to actually listen and hear what his wife is telling him.

In other words, a wife or husband may say that we never go out anymore.

That may be true but what they may be actually saying is don’t you like to be seen with me or don’t you like to go out with me anymore?

It is not necessarily about the date night but it’s more of a personal issue in feeling possibly rejected.

To help in this process it is important to read about marital relationships from experts who can help a husband sort through mixed communication messages.

 

15. Money 

Money can be a big stumbling block when it comes to being a good husband.

The mantra of what is mine is mine and what is yours is mine no longer works in a strong marital relationship.

Not only does the possession of who the money belongs to needs to be established but also the spending and use of the money as it relates to future goals including retirement investments.

It is important that a good husband partner with his wife in regard to money issues.

• Click here to Know Why Money Is Important But Not Everything
• Click here for What to Do to Prevent Money Fights In Your Marriage
• Click here for What to Do When a Husband Tells His Wife His Money is His
• Click here for What to Do When a Husband Wants the Wife to Pay Half of Everything

 

How to Be a Better Husband FAQs

 

What Is the Primary Complaint About a Husband?

One of the major complaints regarding a husband in relation to their spouse is that the husband doesn’t listen.

 

What Would Be the One Important Tip for a Strong Marriage?

Communication is the critical component to any strong relationship.

Communication is not only talking to one another but listening.

Also, it is important to ask for clarification if the message is mixed or “garbled.”

 

You Can Do It

Being a good husband is a challenge.

However, if this is a commitment that a man wishes to pursue, it can be accomplished.

Two of the best ways that working towards this admirable goal would be to read books authored by men and women on how they have and are continually working towards being a good husband.

Another great way of being a better husband is to associate one’s self with individuals who have this common goal and purpose in mind.

 

Conclusion

Being a good husband is a challenge.

Nobody said it would be easy.

There are no easy answers, and it doesn’t occur with the snap of one’s fingers.

Of course, it can happen one step at a time as the husband becomes more aware of what he is doing or not doing and saying or not saying.

If pressed to give a one-sentence solution, perhaps being a good husband can be captured in treating your wife in the same manner that you wish to be treated.